By Lauren Steadman
Halloween is a night that seems simple: put on a costume, walk through the neighborhood, say “trick or treat,” collect some candy and head to the next house. For many families, that is exactly what the night looks like. For others, including many families raising children with disabilities, there is much more happening behind the scenes.
As a parent of children with disabilities, I have learned how much we take for granted in trick-or-treating. For some, challenges begin before they reach a neighbor’s door. Putting on and keeping on a costume may be an accomplishment. Then comes leaving home, walking an unfamiliar route, navigating stairs, waiting in a crowd, managing sudden noises, approaching a stranger’s door and perhaps being expected to speak on command. This simple childhood tradition can ask a tremendous amount of a child.
Sometimes, putting on the costume is the accomplishment. Everything that comes after that is a bonus.
Halloween offers an opportunity for inclusion. Often, that means allowing children to participate in the same experience in the way that works for them.
A child who does not say “trick or treat” is not necessarily being rude. They may be nonspeaking, communicate using an AAC device (augmentative and alternative communication), experience social anxiety, need time to process language or communicate differently. My friend and speech therapist, Kristen Vollor, MS, CCC-SLP, created an Inclusive Trick-or-Treating guide that explains: children do not need to say “trick or treat” to receive a treat. That shift can make a big difference.
Halloween may look different, too. A child wearing headphones may be managing overwhelming sounds. A child may skip a costume because the fabric, mask or accessories are uncomfortable. Some children express excitement by jumping, flapping, clapping, laughing or yelling. And an older child or teenager may still look forward to trick-or-treating.
Give them the candy. Seriously. Give them the candy.
There does not need to be an age limit, a spoken-language requirement or a costume inspection for a child to participate in Halloween.
Physical accessibility matters. If your porch requires stairs, consider offering treats at the bottom of the steps or at the end of the driveway. Some children use wheelchairs or strollers, have difficulty navigating uneven surfaces, or need to remain close to a caregiver for safety. A small change in where treats are handed out can determine whether a child can participate.
Then there are needs we cannot see. For children with severe food allergies, a bucket of candy can contain real risks. Kristen’s guide suggests offering non-food choices such as stickers, glow sticks, temporary tattoos, small toys or bracelets. Families can look for homes participating in the Teal Pumpkin Project, which identifies locations offering non-food alternatives.
Sensory considerations can be just as important. If your Halloween display includes strobe lights, jump scares or intense special effects, consider placing a warning near the beginning of the driveway. A warning gives families the information they need to decide whether that house will work for their child.
What I hope to share through this column each month is that disability is already part of our community. Inclusion does not ask everyone to have the same needs or experiences. It is about recognizing those differences and making room for people to participate.
On Halloween, that might mean moving the candy bowl down a few steps. It might mean keeping a few non-food treats available. It might mean giving a child an extra moment to process what you have said, or simply not expecting them to say anything at all.
And when a child arrives at your door differently than you expected, perhaps the simplest response is: smile, place a treat in their bucket and say, “Happy Halloween. I’m glad you’re here.”
Because that is what an inclusive community should feel like.
Lauren Steadman is co-President of the North Andover Special Education Parent Advisory Council (SEPAC).
Below is a downloadable series of flyers and information on how you can alert trick or treaters to treats and sounds they can expect from your home.
